How to: negotiate like a car dealer

When it comes to the art of negotiation, there's one breed of salespeople who've got it down pat.

It’s a dog-eat-dog world out there and who doesn’t admire the persuasive qualities with which a car dealer can handle themselves in the depths of an important financial transaction. Observing the skilled means by which these artful finaglers proceed to seal the deal, we’ve deduced a quick guide on how to emulate their effective business practices in your everyday life.

1. Appear trustworthy
Endear yourself to those you meet by adopting an empathetic stance. Being relatable is the key to building a trusting rapport with those you are dealing with. Overtly displaying your compassion for their three-legged cat will convince them that you are not like other stereotypically heartless salespeople who are really just after their money.

2. Negotiate
This applies to anyone and everyone you encounter. It is advisable to employ confusion tactics when outlining the convoluted terms of the contract. Take the babysitter for example, instead of adhering to the usual $15 hourly rate, suggest starting at $25 with each successive hour resulting in a fifty percent diminution of the hourly rate and a commission scheme of $3 per hour per child who is in bed before 9pm. Heck, you’ll even throw in a ride home and a complimentary pass to Motat.

3. Close the deal
Create an environment in which your offer has tenacity. A good approach might be to wait until closing time at Farro when you will confidently approach the checkout presenting your offer of $10 for three kilos of scotch fillet and a tin of Beluga caviar. Use the sense of urgency being created by the increasingly restless queue behind you to pressure the checkout clerk into accepting your offer thus avoiding the looming riot that is about to ensue.

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